Sleeping Dogs
by twelvestopsandhome
Summary: ‘Jack’ Ianto nudged the captain’s shoulder with his elbow. ‘stop snoring’'. This is what happens Ianto Jones is woken-up unnecessarily in the middle of the night. Janto rated for language. Fun little one-shot!


Hello folks! So here we are…my first Torchwood fic! Woo! It's all very exciting really…anyway no, I don't anything etc. etc. etc. This basically just a fun little fic which doesn't really need an explanation but I was kind of tiring of fics with sad/depressed Ianto so this one shows he can give as good as he gets… so I hope you enjoy and let me know what you think. Also, really sorry about any errors it hasn't been beta-ed but I've triple checked so it should be okay!

Sleeping Dogs

3.56a.m.

Ianto Jones had been awake for 7 minutes. He rarely woke in the middle of the night anymore and when he did it was usually for good reason. This was not a good reason.

'Jack' Ianto nudged the captain's shoulder with his elbow. 'stop snoring'

'Mmm' was Jack's reply as he momentarily obeyed Ianto's order before embarking on another round of earth shattering snores.

Ianto took a deep breath in hopes of calming himself. When it didn't work he decided physical action was needed and he swiftly launched his heal into the shin of the unsuspecting Jack.

'What the fuck was that for?!' Jack leapt up in the bed 'That hurt!'

'You wouldn't stop snoring' Ianto said almost sinisterly turning over in the bed so his back was to Jack as he examined his shin.

'Yeah well maybe if I had a little more space…' Jack said childishly as he resumed a lying position.

'How exactly does the amount of space you have in the bed affect your snoring?' Ianto asked turned in the bed once more to now face Jack.

'It just does.' Jack made a face before turning away from a now fuming Ianto.

Seemingly to spite the Welshman, Jack had now taken to tossing and turning in the bed like it was nobody's business which (almost) caused Ianto to wish for the snoring instead.

'Okay' Ianto breathed 'that's it. Get out.'

'I'm sorry?' Jack asked with wide eyes.

'Get out of my bed' Ianto repeated calmly.

Jack smiled at him in disbelief and for the second time that night Ianto Jones resorted to physical action, this time using both his legs to attack those of Jack.

'Get out! get out! get out!' he screamed with kicking his legs furiously 'Get the fuck out Jack!'

'Fine!' Jack energetically hopped out of the bed. 'but I'm taking this!' he said pulling the duvet from over Ianto and throwing it over his shoulder 'Ha!'

'Fine' Ianto shrugged 'have the bloody blanket' he smiled as he stretched out on the bed with a contented sigh.

'I'll just sleep in the bath then, shall I?!' Jack said louder than necessary as he marched out of the bedroom.

After having second thoughts about the bath, Jack positioned himself as comfortably as he could on the couch. He smiled to himself as he thought how this was first time he had ever been kicked out of a bed. All he had do to was wait. It was only a matter of time before Ianto came walking in with an apology.

And right on cue Jack heard familiar foot steps approach.

'Feeling guilty?' Jack asked smugly as he felt Ianto's presence behind him.

'No' Ianto said simply as he walked towards a large cupboard on the outskirts of the living room. 'just cold'

'Oh' Jack nodded. 'I wouldn't mind keeping you warm.'

'That's alright' Ianto said pulling a sleeping bag from the cupboard. 'I'd rather not sleep next to a rhino if you don't mind'

'Whoa, you are mean when you're tired' Jack crossed his arms clearly not happy with the 'rhino' comment.

'Yeah well, were you ever told not to wake a sleeping dog?' Ianto asked. 'Sleeping dog!' he exclaimed pointing to himself.

'more like a little bitch' Jack muttered to himself.

'If I wasn't so bloody tired and convinced that in a fight you would more than likely kill me, I would punch you' Ianto said darkly as he struck off for the kitchen.

Several moments passed, in which Jack debated whether it would be safer to follow on into the kitchen or remain on the couch. In light of Ianto's last few words, he decided on the couch.

'Yan?'

Nothing.

'You okay in there?'

'You've eaten me out of house and home you know that right?' Ianto's angry voice came from the kitchen.

Jack chuckled finally standing up.

'and that was not a euphemism!' Ianto added, reading Jack's thoughts.

'I'll make you some coffee…' Jack suggested walking into the kitchen where he found an increasingly pale Ianto sitting on the edge of the counter.

'You're coffee tastes like shit' Ianto said bluntly.

'Harsh but fair' Jack nodded in agreement.

'and we're out of coffee' Ianto added softly.

Jack's eyes widened in horror. 'But…what…how did this happen?'

Ianto shrugged. 'I blame you'

'Of course you do' Jack smiled. 'okay now, go back to bed, I'll even leave you have the duvet back' he smiled wider walking towards Ianto, extending a hand.

'Don't touch me' Ianto said helping himself off the counter to walk past Jack out of the kitchen, to pick up the duvet and once more head towards his bedroom.

'Right then' Jack said to himself looking around the kitchen. He knew he could easily leave and allow Ianto to see out this little 'episode' on his own but as he walked through the apartment he felt himself been pushed further and further away from the front door.

Jack had been spending an increasing amount of time at the apartment and had recently (and rather embarrassingly) accidentally referred to it as 'home'. Ianto had pretended not to notice.

5.03a.m.

Jack looked sorely at the clock in the living room and sighed. He had slipped into a rather bitter mood about twenty minutes ago and he now deeply regretted allowing Ianto take back the duvet. It was at this precise moment that Jack remembered something vital. He was Captain Jack Harkness. No-one told him what to do. No-one threw him out of bed. And no-one made him feel this shit at this hour of the morning.

Jack strode confidently into the bedroom, expecting to find a sleeping Ianto (who he would wake by a whole lot door slamming). But instead, he found Ianto sitting up in the middle of bed with the duvet wrapped around him.

All Jack's anger and bitterness vanished. 'Hey' he said lamely.

'Hi' Ianto replied. 'I thought you left'

'The thought never crossed by mind' he lied. 'Have you been awake all this time?'

'It would sound a lot more romantic if I said yes, wouldn't it?' Ianto smiled throwing the duvet over his head so his back was now against the headboard. He looked up at Jack for a brief moment before patting the space next to him, indicating an invitation.

'Have you returned to your Bruce Banner form then? Jack laughed practically jumping into the bed.

'Nice use of popular culture Sir' Ianto nodded impressed. 'and yes, I think so'

Jack sighed in relief, 'I'm glad. Tired, grumpy, woken-in-the-middle-of-the-night Ianto is scary.'

'Well most people know not to wake me in the middle of the night unless it's an absolute emergency' Ianto said defensively.

'What do you mean 'most people'? Jack asked quizzically. 'Who exactly would be waking you in the middle of the night?'

'eh…Torchwood' Ianto offered.

'Oh yeah' Jack nodded with a smile 'those guys'

'Speaking of…' Ianto turned to check the time. 'We have to get up in about forty minutes.'

'But we've been up half the night!' Jack protested, burying himself into the duvet.

'and whose fault was that?' Ianto asked pulling back the duvet to reveal the trying-to-look innocent expression on Jack's face.

'Please don't kick me out again' he whispered half mockingly, half serious, causing Ianto to replace the blanket over the Captain's face.

'If I had been snoring like you were' Ianto explained 'than you would have kicked me out too.'

Jack climbed out of the duvet to join Ianto against the headboard and shook his head. 'No, I'd never kick you out of bed'

'Well, of course you wouldn't, I'm the ideal bed partner' he said proudly. 'Silent sleeper, me'

'Tell me about it' Jack nodded in agreement 'I've had to double-check you were even breathing a couple of times and yes, you _are_ the ideal bed partner' he smiled evocatively.

'Most of the time' Ianto added.

'Most of the time' Jack agreed. 'Oh, I can't wait to tell the team about middle-of-the-night Ianto!'

'Actually' Ianto began slowly. 'I think they've all already witness what I like to call 'woken-up unnecessarily Ianto'. It was an exceedingly long night at the office, I was napping, Gwen thought I was dead…you know how these things happen.'

'Bet you didn't kick them out of the Hub though' Jack sniggered.

'Oh would you get over it' Ianto rolled his eyes. 'I'm sorry I kicked you out, there happy?'

'Yes, thank you' Jack said in an unusually small voice.

Ianto gave a small smile. 'I _am_ sorry Jack' he leaned in for a quick kiss before throwing his legs over bed and hopping out of it with a kind of enthusiasm Jack would have sworn would have been impossible from the Welshman an hour ago. 'I'm having a shower'

'If I promise not to snore, can I join you?' Jack called into the bathroom.

I kind of wanted a different ending but that's what I settled on…hope you enjoyed it!

Please review if you are that way inclined! Adios!

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